day 5

I've been a miserable bitch all day. as if all this health month crap weren't enough, my allergies have been off the charts for the last couple days. my eyes are constantly watering and filling with crap that glues my eyes together when I sleep (lovely, no?). or rather, when I try to sleep, because by 6 A.M. I cannot breathe through my nose at all, so if my mouth shuts when I'm sleeping, I start to suffocate and wake up gasping for air. this happens all morning until I finally give up on sleeping and get out of bed. so on top of being starving all the time, I'm also itchy, sneezy, and exhausted.

I have already decided that there is no way in hell that I am doing health month again. I know, it's a little early in the game to be so negative about it, but here are the major sticking points thus far:

1) the rules state that no red meat or pork are allowed. fine. but I also hate seafood, and eggs, and I'm not wild about tofu unless it's super crispy fried (read: lots of oil). so that pretty much leaves chicken as my only major source of protein (and turkey, but I made some pasta sauce with ground turkey the other day, and it was kinda gross). nuts are high protein, you might say, but I only like peanuts. so chicken and peanuts. awesome. that's what I have to eat, every day, for a month. chicken and peanuts. in hind sight, health month is a bad idea for picky eaters.

2) after work, I go home, sit on the couch, gulp tea and wait for it to be late enough for me to go to bed. unhealthy though it may be, my social life revolves around drinking, and without the drinking, I have nothing to do. I will probably go out if there's a show I really want to go see, but honestly, I don't think I can handle just hanging out at a bar, not drinking, not smoking.. I just don't think I'm that strong. and frankly, it sounds pretty boring. and that isn't exactly the point of health month, is it? isn't it more about living your regular life in a more healthy manner, as opposed staying home and watching tv for a month because you can't go anywhere without being offered booze, or queso, or frito goddamned pie and you just can't handle saying no to all of it, every day? perhaps I'm weak. hell, I know I'm weak. I cried out of frustration all the way home on my bike this evening, and it's only day five.

so yeah, I'm pretty much hating health month.

**

banana
three cups decaf
apple with peanut butter
two fistfuls granola
salad with a little chicken
nugget island (tofu, broccoli, baby bok choy, cauliflower, carrots, napa cabbage, fried tofu, onion and garlic in a spicy  sauce with brown rice)  
bowl popcorn
cup detox tea
cup cranberry tea